Sometimes we get caught up in life and get twisted up with becoming who everybody wants us to be. Whether you're a lawyer, a doctor, an engineer, a chemistry student or even a momma or dadda, these are only our roles in life; it is not who we really are deep down.
Societies place harsh labels on us originating from our profession or our current place in life. Is it possible to somehow keep our sense of self, whether it's in a relationship or a career? We can, but it requires work and constant check-ins.
How do we do this?
A good start is to write down all the things you want to be in your life, your goals, your aspirations, your dreams. Everyone's dreams are different; some aspire to become artists, some yearn to have children and some just want that degree. Write all these things down, keep it in your bedroom and look at it regularly. After some time, you'll notice something happening. Your needs and goals will change over time and you'll add to the list, you'll erase some, there will be some that are crossed off or checked off. But you will also notice something that's gold. One or two of those dreams will remain on the paper, year after year, or sometimes it will be crossed off because you've been told it's unachievable. But you can still feel it thumping in your heart.
Listen to that thump. Keep those nuggets of gold that you've found. Don't ever let go of these things, no matter where your career or family goals take you.
If you are a daddy or a mommy raising little ones, you are still YOU. If you are a doctor or a lawyer giving life saving advice, when you go home, you are still YOU. If you are currently tangled up in a relationship, you are still the person that you were in the beginning, TRUST that. If you are that engineer or chem student, at the end of the day when you get off the train, you can shed that layer and just BE YOU.
As the last rays of sunshine fall below the horizon, spend some time alone; even if your life is in an emotional whirlwind, step off and walk alone. It's valuable time, even if it's ten minutes. Close your eyes and check-in with yourself but remember to be gentle, kind and be your own best friend.
Don't be afraid to be yourself; YOU is all you really have. Make it a life full of passion, dreams and love.
- JA Boulet March 3, 2020